A matter of survival

Showers at Night.Warm.29C

Tonight's episode of House was the first, of all I've seen (I missed the first two), that had a death, made me teary, and induced me to write a diary entry on it.

The choice between the mother or the baby, the decision of staying or going, the vote to keep your friend or the donation is all really about surviving. And each of these cross-roads the decision will block out the other side completely - only one will survive. In this imperfect world, that's how things work. You can't keep thinking things will resolve in the way you imagine and it would eventually come true. Many times, the resource for surviving is really just enough for one, and sacrifice must be made. Of course, we could all blame Vogler on cancelling the first C-section, and Naomi would have lived. But who knows? Maybe she'll pass the C-section and the clinical experiment, but she couldn't make it for long? No matter what the result will be, the moment to make the decision is the toughest. It's like taking a huge bet, because when you're talking about 80% survival of the baby if born pre-maturely or 15% of Naomi's living if she postpones the treatment of her cancer, you're not sure if the odds are truly going to turn out the way it was expected. You may end up losing both ways. In a matter of life and death, even 100% certainty cannot really make anyone feel comfortable. Taking either choice will create some sort of guilt, remorse, despair... but it's a choice that has to be made.

The theme runs along the other plotlines of the episode: Dr. Wilson's vote, Vogler's "House goes or I go" threat, and even what Chase did in the previous episode, are all about choices that you have to make to survive. Of course, circumstances are a little different in these latter examples. They are situations created by Vogler, which could have been non-existent in the first place if Vogler didn't see House as a threat and an eyesore. Whereas, in Naomi's case, she was powerless. She and the baby, and even the husband, were forced into those circumstances. They didn't choose to create the complication, they were simply placed in it.

This is also an episode that shows how human being react when they come to a critical decision. Husband wanted the wife to live, while the mother wanted to protect the child, even an unborn one. The amibitious young doctor would do anything to keep his job and be placed on the right track, while the good old friend was willing to give up the two things that he's got left, the job and the screwed up friendship, to protect his friend. Board members would vote for the money so that they can have a bigger budget (for everything?!) and keeping their own butt in the board room seat (especially after seeing Wilson got sacked), whereas the guardian of the hospital, after some mental struggle, still finds the mission of saving people's lives more important. But who can say anyone of them is wrong? To them, they only have to make the decision that is right for themselves, as they are, fundamentally, only responsible for themselves.